Motherhood is one of the most fulfilling experiences of a woman’s life. But the journey to becoming one is never easy. Pregnancy, in particular, is probably the most challenging part of every new mother. And not all women can go through the nine months of sacrifices and compromises. There are a lot of factors that lead to surrogate pregnancy. Availing the surrogate method does not make you less of a woman nor a mother. And in this article, you’ll get to know more about how to become a surrogate mother.
What is a surrogate mother?
First things first, surrogacy is a method wherein a woman legally agrees to carry and bear a child for another person. This fertility arrangement is very important for women who can’t undergo the laborious 9 months of pregnancy. More so, there are other reasons why intended parents make use of the surrogate method to start their family. And you’re eyeing to enter the world of surrogacy, here’s a list of some important information that you ought to know beforehand. Let’s start with its pros and cons.
The Pros
1. The joy of helping another woman
Women supporting women is an act that deserves appreciation. And surrogate mothers are one of the most selfless women to do such a thing. Being a surrogate mother offers you a unique kind of fulfillment in granting another woman’s desire for motherhood because in reality, not all women can get pregnant. Hence, a surrogate mother is a pivotal instrument in helping another woman become a real mother.
2. A unique journey to motherhood
If you want to experience motherhood in a rather unconventional way, then this is a great method. Some women take delight in being pregnant, and being a surrogate mother allows them to enjoy such a journey over and over again.
3. Monetary benefits
Unless you do it out of charity for a loved one, a surrogate mother actually gets a hefty monetary compensation. This amount is tantamount to the effort and sacrifices you undergo for the entire pregnancy.
The Cons
1. Lengthy process and strict procedures
Becoming a surrogate mother does not happen overnight. On top of the 9 months pregnancy, you need to allocate time for the screening process, which is quite lengthy. And while being pregnant, there are a lot of tests that needed to be completed. So, do take note that time commitment is very important for aspiring surrogates.
2. Physical and emotional challenges
But of course, you can’t just disregard the challenges of becoming a pregnant woman. The fertility treatments and possible complications may affect not just your physical well-being but also your mental health. Therefore, you have to be physical and emotionally stable if you want to undergo surrogacy. Saying yes to becoming a surrogate mother is accepting the risks the accompany it.
How to Become a Surrogate Mother?
If you have taken into account all the pros and cons, then it’s time for the next step―the process of becoming one. We’ve rounded up the key steps of a normal surrogate experience.
1. Selecting the surrogacy type
Traditional or gestational? These are the two types of surrogacy. The former uses the egg of the surrogate mother and the sperm of the intended father. It follows the traditional pregnancy process, hence the name. With such a method, the surrogate mother is actually considered as the biological mother of the baby. On the other hand, gestational surrogacy gets help from a cutting-edge technology called the in vitro fertilization. Because of this, the surrogate mother is not biologically related to the baby. She is just tagged as a gestational carrier because the eggs and sperm used are personally taken from the intended parents.
2. Completing the screening requirements
Before anything else, some requirements are needed to be accomplished to ultimately become a surrogate mother. In general, the screening process is divided into three―medical, legal, and psychological.
Medical screenings cover all the relevant information about your pregnancy records. Most states require at least one successful pregnancy in your history. Likewise, your BMI has an impact on your application. Often, surrogate mothers should have a BMI of 19 to 33. Aside from the evaluation of your medical history, there will be physical exams, along with smoke and drug tests.
Psychological screenings are also imperative among surrogate mothers. Consequently, there will be mental health check-ups to determine your psychological state as a woman and as a mother. So if you want to pursue being a surrogate, it’s a must to have a strong support system that will back you up throughout the process.
Legal screenings take effect once you have completed the medical requirements. Here, there will be a legal agreement between the surrogate and the intended parents. If you’re residing in the US and planning to become a surrogate mother, there are certain guidelines to follow. These include proof of your US citizenship and evidence that you aren’t receiving any financial aid from the government.
3. Validating the agreement
Once you complete the screening stage, then you have the option to do it independently or via an agency. Either way, a legal and binding contract is a crucial part of surrogacy. This way, you will know the specific guidelines as well as the timeline of your surrogacy. Having a contract is vital because there could be unforeseen complications during pregnancy. Also at this point, the payment terms will be discussed between the intended parents and surrogate mother, with the assistance of their legal representatives.
4. Undergoing fertility treatments
Since most surrogate mothers and intended parents opt for gestational surrogacy, it’s relevant to include the process of transferring the embryo. This procedure, however, is not instant. In fact, it’s a lengthy one as you have to complete various fertility treatments to ensure that you get a healthy pregnancy. Furthermore, the treatments are not just limited to taking hormonal medications. It may also include medical procedures. It will be the doctor’s decision whether or not you are fit to become a surrogate mother.
5. Carrying out the pregnancy and birth
Now, this is where the real challenge kicks in. Pregnancy is such a crucial stage for a woman. Along with regular check-ups, you will have to deal with the changes in your body. You have to be very careful not just for the child but also for your own welfare. Moreover, there may be possible medical intervention, hence the need to be in constant communication with the intended parents of the child. Therefore, it is significant to deliberate any pressing issues that may affect your pregnancy. In most surrogacy agreements, travel expenses, maternity clothes, and medications are covered by the intended parents. And during the birthing phase, the intended parents are also likely to be present to witness the delivery of the baby.
FAQ that you need to know
Is surrogacy legal?
It depends on the state or the country. In the US, most states allow surrogacy, and only four do not allow such a method. These include New York, Nebraska, Louisiana, and Michigan. Surrogacy is also prohibited in countries such as Bulgaria, France, Italy, Germany, and Portugal.
Can anyone become a surrogate mother?
Generally, any fertile woman can be a surrogate mother. However, certain requirements needed to be completed before you are allowed to do so. These include pregnancy history, BMI, age, screening tests, and other relevant steps listed above.
What’s the age requirement of a surrogate mother?
Most surrogacy agencies follow a specific age limit. Surrogates should be at least 21 years old, with a maximum age of 37 years old. However, some intended parents may allow an exception to the general rules.
Can I be a surrogate even if I don’t have a child yet?
Ideally, agencies require you to have at least once a successful pregnancy for you to be admitted as a possible surrogate mother. Your pregnancy history establishes your capacity as an individual to handle the fertility treatments and the 9 months of carrying a child.
Can I become a surrogate multiple times?
A woman can become a surrogate mother more than once. In most cases, agencies only allow up to 5 times, which tally all your pregnancy histories. So, if you’re already a mother of 3, then you can undergo surrogacy up to 2 times.
What are the benefits of surrogate mother?
The crucial steps, along with the emotional and mental challenges, are well compensated. Surrogate mothers come with a pricey reward. Often, the monetary benefits start from $50,000 up to $80,000. This amount, however, may vary depending on the state or country, together with all other factors.
How is s a surrogate baby born?
Just like any other pregnancy, it can either be natural birth or C-section. This will largely depend on key factors and other possible complications during the course of pregnancy. Once the baby is born and given to the new parents, the legal agreement of surrogacy is now fulfilled.
Do surrogate mothers still have rights after the baby is born?
That depends on the legal agreements followed by the surrogate and the intended parents. Normally, there are three agreements to be accomplished to ensure smooth-sailing surrogacy. It starts with the general surrogacy guidelines, the pre-birth contract, and the post-birth agreement. Another factor is the willingness of the intended parents to give rights to the surrogate mother. There are even some instances when surrogates and the new parents have close ties that they take part in raising the child.
In a nutshell, mothers, either natural or surrogate ones, are all remarkable. They carry the responsibility of shaping a new human being and keeping them in good hands for nine long months. The sleepless nights, the morning sickness, and the unwanted changes―all these are embraced by mothers wholeheartedly. The journey is never easy but it’s worth it. So, we hope that this article has helped you in knowing the importance and the key process of how to become a surrogate mother. Visit 4inBandana now for more useful information!
